255 Days and Counting....

Yesterday, I was looking over the things-to-do checklist at theknot.com, and at the top of the page it said "September 30, 2006 • DAYS TO GO: 256". Nice to have that friendly reminder every day.

We have made a little more progress. We've picked a church - St. John's United Church of Christ. We saw a couple of pictures of it in an album at the bridal show, and went to check it out. The sanctuary is domed, and so the pews are curved. It is really pretty neat. It is supposed to be able to seat 700 people, yet it doesn't seem cavernous. It won't require a million decorations. The altar is not especially big, which will be nice for our small wedding party. I am pretty happy with the choice so far.

I think we've also decided to have the reception at the Packard Museum. There are still a few details to work out there - like signing a contract and then making a decision about catering. I guess baby steps are okay.

So what's appropriate, anyway?

Naturally, wedding planning is pretty much consuming nearly every waking moment right now. Lots of plans to make, and details to tend to. Since we've announced our engagement, I've heard more than one time about how something isn't 'appropriate' for a second-time wedding. Frankly, I think most of that etiquette crap is B.S. My personal opinion is that having the wedding that is an event that we both want is what is 'appropriate'. Just because this isn't the first time I've had a wedding doesn't mean that I should slink away quietly and get married someplace far away if that's not what I want to do.

Ever since we started talking about getting married, I've been thinking of how I can make this wedding different than the first - more fun, less stuffy and pretentious. I'm not out to impress anyone with my big, fancy wedding. It's more about getting together with my friends and family, and celebrating our day. If I want to wear a white dress and a veil - so be it! If I want to get married in a church, that's okay too.

Since I am in wedding planning mode, the book that I'm currently reading is titled, "The Wedding Guide for the Grownup Bride". It was written by a woman who was married for the first time in her early 40's to a man that was divorced. She makes a lot of good points about all of the things that go into planning a wedding when you are a 'mid-life bride', as she puts it. It's not just all about the flowers and the caterer. It's also about your career, your established, independent life, and things like that. The favorite thing that I've read so far is in the chapter called 'Coors light or Candlelight - Matters of Style'. It says, "On matters of style... consider this

• Again, forget about rules. Don't let anyone convice you that traditional weddings are inappropriate or silly for mature brides.
• If you are a second-timer, consider doing things differently than you did before."

and, finally

• Focus on fun rather than doing things "right."

So, for all of those who think a traditional wedding is inappropriate for a second-time bride, they either need to get over it or keep their inappropriate thoughts to themselves. I'm busy looking for cotton candy, funnel cake, and Brutus the Buckeye.

Progress

Well, we have made some progress. Not a lot, but some nonetheless. First, we have picked a date - September 30, 2006. That is 264 days from today!

We have picked a photographer. We met with him last Thursday and looked at some of his work, which is all SO good. Tim wanted to get an idea what else was out there to have something to compare with, so Saturday we headed off to the bridal show. There were several photographers there, and there was just no one that compared in quality and price. There were many that were less expensive, but their photos were crap - and, as Tim noted, a lot of the photos were out of focus.

I've called the florist, and am meeting with him tomorrow. Tim asked if we should comparison shop, and I've assured him that there is no need. This guy is just plain good, and there is no point in wasting much time.

So......we need to pick our venue(s). I hit a real snafu a couple of weeks ago when I discovered that in order to get married in a Catholic church again, I will have to have an annullment. I'm not sure why their rules apply to me, the non-Catholic, but apparently they do. As a result, we've talked about all kinds of places to get married. We'd settled on the Dayton Art Institute until we found out that they are completely booked for all of 2006 except for August 12. We looked at the Packard Museum, which is still a potential reception site, but not appropriate for a ceremony too. We stopped at Cox Arboretum Saturday, and that is also a potential reception site, but there just didn't seem to be room to have both a ceremony and reception, unless we plan something outside. I just don't want to stress about the weather, and so I have to nix the outdoor idea. If it's nice, I'm happy to go outside for pictures - but I don't want the entire event to depend on the weather being good. Too much stress.

Also on Saturday, we saw some photos of a wedding in a church that is ironically called St. John's. As Tim pointed out, there was Saint John and then there was that other, not-so-saintly John. I guess if he doesn't have a problem with it, neither do I. I called there this morning, and hope to stop by there one day this week to take a look in person. The pictures looked good anyway.

I ran into an old friend on Saturday. She owns a catering business and was at the bridal show. I'm going to give her a call later in the week and see what advice she has for me.

Today is also weigh-in day. Ugh. I have been so uninspired since Christmas. It shows at the scale. I need to get back on track and start losing again. At least I haven't gained.